Predictable and Not

2 kids.  Phew.  12 days.  Phew.  The hardest part is over right?  (Kidding).  It's been an interesting transition so far to parenting 2 children.  I can see what people mean when they say that transitioning from 1 to 2 isn't as bad as 2 to 3.  Why?  Because right now, it's man-on-man.  Course, Jason and I haven't so much as exchanged a full sentence since Toby arrived, but at least he can be taking care of Silas and I can be taking care of Toby and we're covered.  That also means that the house goes largely neglected...  What I think will be a much larger transition will be when Jason goes back to work.  Then what?  Game over.  I'm in for it!  Silas is a constant blur of activity and Toby looks like he will be just as spirited.  Oh boy(s). Here's a bit of a recap over these last 12 or so days in terms of what is not so different, or predictable, and what has been unexpected.


Predictable: Toby feeds every 2-3 hours and gets up every 2-3 hours in the night too.  Not surprised.  Been here before, know that it will get better. 
Unpredictable: However, despite our first impression that he was a 'sleepy' baby, he doesn't settle without being rocked or held or stuck onto one of us.  Yikes.


Predictable: That Silas would have a hard time with having a sibling and not be himself.  We expected that.
Unpredictable: Just how much Silas has been acting out lately. He is testing us left, right and center.  Every time we have to change his diaper or put on a jacket or anything of the sort- he has a fit.  Sigh.  He is in full on toddler-hood.  [See this hilarious post on another blogger's site, this is exactly what Silas has been like lately: Sunscreen or this one: yogurt].


Predictable:  We knew that we'd have a harder time getting out than before
Unpredictable:  But, it takes us so much longer than we thought it would!  Are we all dressed in clean clothes?  Have the kiddo's diapers been changed?  Has Toby been fed?  Do we have extras of everything?  Has Silas eaten?  Do we have snacks?  [30 min later] Silas pooped again, Toby is awake now, do we have _______.  Gah.


Predictable: That we would be up lots in the night with Toby.  
Unpredictable: That we would be up in the night with Silas and that he would change his rising time from 8 am until 6 am.  Not. A. Good. Time. For. This.  Please oh please don't tell me he's ready for getting rid of his nap (?)  Heaven forbid!


Unpredictable: How much Silas is interested in Toby!  I had thought Silas would largely ignore Toby but he always asks about him when he first wakes up, wants to 'see' what Toby is doing, and is constantly in his face touching or kissing him!  [And poking his eyes, pulling his arms and pretending to hit him.  We're working on that whole 'gentle' concept].


Unpredictable: How much pain I'd have postpartum.  Arg.  So much to get done and so little energy/ability to do it all!  Stupid C-section.


That's enough for now.  It's been an interesting time over these last 12 days getting used to another member of the family.  We love this special time we get to share together.  I LOVE having Jason around to help out and spend so much time with Silas.  Silas is changing all the time and has us laughing by his antics and we are often  amazed at all the vocabulary he is picking up.  He's a sharp little man!  One of these days I have to blog some of the funny things he's been saying.  I look forward to seeing Silas experience Christmas this year and seeing Toby and Silas play together (one day).  For now though, back to basics: one day at a time!  Sleep, eat, breastfeed, repeat.  Back to the grind =)

Thankful

Today I attempted to take both children out with me, by myself.  Okay, I'm taking too much credit.  I simply went to our Church's weekly women's event and Jason drove me there, unloaded the kiddies, and helped me get them ready (so I'm not a superhero or anything).  But just as Jason left- Silas had a big fit, throwing himself on the floor.  He wanted to go see the Christmas lights and didn't want to go hang out in the nursery even though he loves it.  I had to discipline, and pull, and encourage, and cajole this little boy to walk to the nursery (as I cannot lift him for another couple of weeks because of my incision).  We got there and he had another huge fit at the thought of leaving me.  Poor fella.  There's been so much change for him recently!  But he went eventually to his favourite nursery worker Kelly and off I went with Toby to enjoy some community, coffee, and well, to show off my new little boy.  


All in all it went well!  Toby slept the whole time, I never got paged to rescue Silas, and somehow I made it through the whole event without needing to feed Toby or my chest exploding (not sure how).  But by the end of the 2 hours I was ready to go home as my incisional pain increased.   I felt really blessed by the encouraging words of the women there, and their oohing and aahhing at my little boy.  Came home, and had two visitors- both bearing incredible meals and who both spent some time chit-chatting.  It felt great seeing friends and family and even being dressed and 'up' enough to greet and host them.  All this to say, I feel so incredibly blessed!  Our community has come around us and supported us in the last week of change and I feel so inspired and encouraged.  I want to be that type of person that blesses others in this way!  How amazing it feels to be part of a Church and family that take care of us and help nourish us with prayers, words, and FOOD.  Sigh.  Thank you Jesus!

I forgot...

So labour is done (PTL), we're home (phew) and we are right in IT.  Life with a newborn that is.  We are knee deep in breastfeeding (more accurately- I am), and are spending our days in pajamas trying to discipline a toddler, soothe a newborn and not go stir crazy in the process.  Funny how you forget this newborn phase.  Actually, maybe that's how God ensures we have more children- if we didn't forget we wouldn't do this again.  But here we are!  Course, it's not all reward-less and awful.  There are perks too- which I also forgot.  


Case in point:
I Forgot: just how dreadful labour is.  Eeeeek.  Hard.  Ugh. (story to come)
But I Also Forgot: the incredible relief, the joy, the emotional high of meeting your little healthy baby finally.


I Forgot: how awful and painful recovery after C-section is (but then, I was hoping for a VBAC and hadn't planned on another C-section so got to have 27 hours of labour AND a C-section...more on that later)
But I Forgot: how amazing it is to hold and cuddle a newborn which makes the pain more bearable.


I Forgot: how exhausting feeding a newborn is.  GAH. That part of my body has not been used like that for 2 years and is seriously out of shape.  In fact, it's like they've been run over by a tractor or been through war, or ...you get the point.  OWWWIE.
But I Forgot: how lovely it is to see a little babe staring up at you and trusting you to meet his needs.


I Forgot: about nights.  Oh the nights.  They are looong, repetitive, blurry, and ugh.  Every three hours we do the same thing.  Over and over and over again.
But I Forgot: just how wonderful my husband is (if that's even possible to forget).  He helps me in the nights, makes sure I get the rest I need, and I don't know how I'd do it without him.


I Forgot: that I'd spend my days and nights with reckless hair, in pajamas, stuck in the house, looking and feeling icky (visitors welcome but beware)
But I didn't forget: things will get better.  One day at a time.


This is a different time for us this go-around because of Silas.  He is a new added person to this mix.  He makes sure that we don't stay in the house too long (or else he goes crazy) and keeps us entertained during the long hours of the day.  He also makes sure we keep our wits about us as we have to, at a moments notice, make sure he is not hitting baby, pulling his arm, poking his eye, or kissing him too aggressively.   Parenthood is upon us!


Thanks for everyone's support out there!  I'm determined to remain positive and optimistic that as we go along, it will get easier and better!  We have much to be thankful for: healthy boy #2, and he's actually so far a pretty good baby.  Even went 5 hours between feeds at night last night letting us sleep longer!  One thing that remains a mystery is: will my thyroid want to jump up and down and demand attention soon, or will it remain dormant.  Please pray for the latter!

The Latest

out walking (what a cutie!)

Silas has the best dad in the world!

figuring out how to get the goods

"choc-o-ate" 

 out walking on the MR dikes with Oma and Opa (Silas stealing Daddy's hat!)

love the dikes

Hiking at Minnekhada- taking a banana break

 Beautiful day for Minnekada

pre-bathroom reno (had already removed the old, old rusted sink and cabinet)

reno break....in a box (don't ask me how Jason squeezed in there!)

almost completed project- just have to paint over little holes in the wall (our first attempt at placing the TP roll), and maybe change the rug and add a little stand (?)

How to stay busy when 9 months pregnant

Step 1:  Decide that you just HAVE to finish basting your quilt before the baby arrives.  Which, by the way, entails being on your knees on a hardwood floor, crouched and crunched while contracting with braxton hicks.  It means holes in your fingertips and a sore back from leaning over for a few hours on end.  And in my case, since I'm not good at researching FIRST and then beginning a project, after basting the whole quilt with my gracious mother-in-law's help, we found out that we needed to take it all out, wash the back and front, fix some holes in the quilt, re-iron, and re-do the entire quilt's basting.  Ugh.  


Step 2: Convince your husband that he absolutely MUST begin (and finish) renovating the bathroom.  So far that has meant:

• removing previous vanity
• repainting walls
• painting trim around mirrors a different colour
• cutting numerous holes in the new vanity to fit plumbing
• reworking the plumbing
• removing some baseboard pieces and putting in new ones (oh yeah, and painting them)
• and hopefully putting up some fun decals on the wall

What this actually means is that hubby is very occupied (thanks dear!) and Silas must be watched by mommy (while at the same time basting a quilt that a busy toddler is not allowed to walk on- ha!)  Thanks to Oma and Opa this is possible!


Step 3: Get sick
That will help keep you busy!  Somehow I've acquire a burning sore throat that has me a little terrified. Oh boy.  Lord- heal me before I go into labour (wouldn't that totally suck to be sick and in labour?!!!)


Step 4: Convince yourself you must finish Christmas letters before the baby arrives
That means, for me, 160 hand-written notes.  Why?  I dunno.  But on principle, I want to continue the tradition I've had for over 12 years.  Really, we should have planned a baby for a different time of year for a change!


Step 5: Also try to complete every odd, half-finished project in the house that has been on the list forever.  Enter grandparents.  Thankfully Jason's mom and dad have been in town and have been a huge help toward this end.  Our side tables in our bedroom are painted after they have sat there unpainted for half a year, a curtain rod and curtains are now hung in our office, covering over a closet-door-less closet stuffed with boxes and books.  It feels good.  But busy.


Step 6: Write a blog post about it.


All this to say that I am eager for baby's arrival but feel the 'pressure' to get 'er all done before he/she arrives. I guess I will surface again at some point after the baby's born but I still feel like somehow I should do all of this before I am a mother of 2 and not 1!

Full Term: Countdown Continues!

I cannot believe that this baby could come any day now.  Part of me feels like I am just so ready to be done pregnancy so 'bring it on' but the other part of me, probably the bigger part of me, is very anxious about this go-around.  Will this labor experience be everything I'm hoping that the last one was not?  Will I have thyroid issues again?  How will Silas do with a new little warm body around the house all the time?  

I also cannot believe that we will no longer be a family of 3- but 4!  That means two carseats, a double stroller, two little mouths to feed, 2 bums to clean, are we ready?  Like last time, is there anything that could possibly make you ready for a change like this?

I feel very unsettled as the day approaches.  I have work shifts yet to complete and furniture yet to buy, cupboards to organize, and Christmas to plan (yeah right).  I guess in some ways that's better than 'sitting around' on my thumbs waiting for the baby to come.  How to spend these last days?  

Lord prepare me in the ways I cannot, give me peace to cover my anxieties over things I cannot control anyways, and fill me with all I will need to be a mom all over again!