Busy Bags

An oldie but a goodie: 

This summer I attended my first busy bag making party. What a great way to meet new people, swap some fun tot-stuff and get my creative juices flowing.  

I made 8 of them.  Silas loved playing with them while I put them together:

This was the one I made: dyed pasta, cut up straws, beads and pipe cleaners.  

Favorite moment over the summer with it?  On a dinner cruise where few other families had activities for their kids.  It went longer than expected and I whipped out this 
bad-boy. 

Crowd pleaser.  Soon I had 10 kids surrounding me and fighting over pipe cleaners.  Good times.  

One received from my friend: cupcake decorating!  (Good one Michelle!)

28 Reasons for Joy

Didn't get a chance to post this yesterday because I was too busy having an awesome day.  Thanks for all those who messaged me, visited, and made my day! Yesterday's post:

I am a lucky woman.  Truly.  I have had many joy-filled, life-changing, wonderful moments and memories in my 28 years of life.   I've been inspired and loved by incredible people.  I've been to amazing places - exploring and discovering.

This post is probably more for me than anyone- collecting reasons I have to be thankful.  It's a fitting way to spend my few free moments alone on this 28th birthday of mine:

1. First day in Hawaii on a family vacation.  Strolling the beach early in the morning with my dear Father.  Sharing, talking, buying cinnamon buns.
2. Fighting about a sewing machine with my mom.  It was such an infamous episode of ridiculous mis-communication that we still laugh our heads off about it. (This moment and staying in a hostel in Italy with my Mom are my two fav memories).
3. Stepping off the plane into my new life in Ottawa. I was leaving home as a new high-school graduate.  Exhilarated and terrified.  On the edge of the unknown and though I didn't know it yet, at the beginning of some of the best years of my life.
4. A surprise birthday party thrown for me only three months into freshman year at Carleton University.  An incredible community of friends.  A new winter coat.  Felt so blessed and treasured.
5. Long drives on country roads, music blaring with a new driver's license   Tears streaming.  Meeting God in some lonely times and places.
6. A cabin in the woods.  A retreat with University friends.  Late nights of sharing, meal making, games, wrestling in the snow.  The best weekend. Singing my heart out while Jason played guitar [not yet dating].
7. Summers at kids camp as a counselor.  The best.  Qwanoes rocked.
8. Long cozy evenings snuggling together [Jason and I of course], all bundled, next to a river in Ottawa.  And then, he said "I love you" for the first time.  [Sigh].
9. Hiking the West Coast Trail.  Fresh air, tiring days, beach combing, ladder climbing, misty mornings, chocolate trail mix.  It was incredible.
10. Hours on my bike as a kid.  Thinking, dreaming, praying, writing poetry and songs.  Exploring, discovering, pondering.  Still love my bike.
11. Meeting and falling in love with Jason's family.  Blonde heads, big hugs, warm smiles, game playing, hikes, talks, love them all.  Each one.
12. Breezing through Costa Rican treetops (zip-lining) on our incredibly adventurous honeymoon.
13. First time to Africa.  Safari in Tanzania early in the morning with the sun rising over the savanna   It was unbelievable, poetic, and inspiring.
14. My first missions trip. (Mexico)  Serving, caring, giving, in community.  Was so fulfilling.
15. Hugging my brother.  I dunno, it still makes me want to cry every time.
16. Deciding to change directions and go to nursing school.  Haven't regretted that decision for a second.  After a good days' work of mental, emotional, physical exertion it always feels amazing. I'm doing exactly what I was made to do.
17. First kiss.  Burnaby mountain, with the man I now call husband.  So totally awkward and so incredibly innocent and priceless.
18. Riding on the back of a motor bike in rural Burkina Faso to deliver health care.  Hilarious. Memorable.
19. Hiking around Arches national park.  How is that place real?
20. The pure relief and the flood of emotions overwhelming me the moment I held Silas for the first time.  I could not stop crying.  Such joy, such an incredible sense of meaning. Awe.
21. Hiking in Cinque Terre.  The sunshine, the exertion, the sea-air, exploring such an incredible landscape with Jason.  My favourite place in the world (thus far).
22. French pastries, consumed in France. Need I say more?!  Chocolate...butter....
23. Graduating from highschool was a huge high.  So much before me, so much behind me.  I had so many great times as a youth with incredible friends and support.  Sports, academics, friends...and at grad: a future wide open.  Dry grad was amazingly fun.
24. Snuggling up with Toby on my chest.  This boys' dimpled cheeks, curly soft blonde hair, bright blue eyes and chubby cheeks fills my heart in places I never knew were empty.
25.  Arriving in Ouagadougou knowing that we were going to be living in Burkina for 6 months.  New sights, new sounds, warm community, new language, new life...
26.  Running a half marathon around Stanley Park with Jason at my side.  Beautiful day, awesome adventure.   (City chase was equally fun!)
27.  Being there when a person passes from this life to the next.  Caring for someone dying is incredibly spiritual.
28. Biking around the gulf islands with Jason.  Romantic, relaxing, lovely.

How can I complain, ever?

I am rich in more ways than most people around the world will ever have the privilege of knowing and experiencing.

Filthy rich.

I deserve none of it but thank God for all of it.

Party Goer

A busy weekend of parties and creating for 'em.  I loved getting the creative juices flowing again.  Here's some evidence of the messy merri-making madness.

• Baby shower cupcakes.  Yes I made some in baby jars.  No, I wouldn't do it again.  They were cute but hard to eat.  However, it was fun and I enjoyed using up those accumulating jars in my cupboard.

• 40th birthday bash.  I tried this on pinterest and it failed.  Oh Martha.  How do you make it look so easy? [Where did she buy easy-knotting chives from?!]  I ended up with this instead:  

Tooth picks stabbed into tiny bits of vegetables?  Done.  Did it take longer than it should?  Head nod.  I also gave a humorous gift for the birthday boy: 40 suckers with a list of "40 things that suck worse than turning 40" which included random things like this 

[the list was completely assembled sans pinterest]:

1. having rabies

12. sinking your car in a very large puddle*

17. battery operated toys

18. vomiting out your nose

23. burning your nipple with a hot iron

26. decaf coffee

33. getting your tie stuck in an automatic door

*true story

Not a glamorous presentation, mind you.

• It's my birthday tomorrow and when hubby asked me what I wanted, I told him that I wanted him and my 2.5 year old to make me a cake [this was largely because Silas loves baking and loves cake].  I didn't realize Jason had never ever in his life made one before. Result?

Vegan chocolate yummy-ness and fun family to enjoy it with.  Good job dear! 

Advent and the Christmas Countdown

More time together.  More anticipation.  

More planning.  Less spending.  

I've been inspired by a lot of Advent Conspiracy videos and a lot of the home-made, crafting ideas found on pinterest - especially this and this.  How can we return Christmas to it's true meaning, it's true beauty?

Silas is almost 3 and I am so excited to start making some Christmas traditions happen.  I've done lots of reading and have started planning.  We want to teach him the true 'magic' of Christmas:

giving, loving, family, thankfulness, worship, joy, peace, Christ.

Here's the plan:

• Each morning, the 'wise men' on camels will move a little bit from one corner of the house to the nativity scene (as they came from far away).  First thing in the morning he will get to see where they are and we will also share a bit about the Christmas story. 
• Each afternoon Silas will open a box for advent (big or small) with the name of the activity we are going to do that day, with a little present (that most likely will contribute to that activity in some way), and an ornament to hang on the tree (ones we already own)
• Each evening we will do an awesome, family-fun activity that is in the spirit of true Christmas
• Each bedtime Silas will get to un-wrap one of 25 Christmas books (most used, most that we already own, some from the library, all wrapped up fancy-like) and we'll read them together

So excited.

First step:

Make advent boxes. I have collected 15 boxes so far which I will wrap up or paint (haven't decided) and have started searching for cheap Christmas tins as well.  I'll affix numbers on them and decide where to put them.  Stay tuned for our mega-exciting, anticipation building, fun-filled 25 day activity list.  Post to come...

Any activities we must have on the list?  What are some of your favourite Christmas activities?

a Hurricane Needs to be Held

Like a little hurricane, Silas rages and fits around the house.  He becomes destructive, wreckless, distraught, emotional, and angry.

Then, mid-tantrum, in the eye of the storm there will be this innocent stillness about him.  A moment of recognizing un-met need.  

Silas will stop and whimper:

"Mommy, I need a snuggle."

What looked like fury, was actually fear. Even when all my ugliness is evident, am I loved?  Accepted?  Can I still return to safe arms?  

Would you believe, that at 28 years of age, I'm still a 2 year old?  

My emotions rage, my quick temper flares, my anger bashes against others, and my frustrations blow others away.  

But, If I stop and just look at what is really wrong, if I am just honest with myself I would see that: I just need a snuggle. An internal one.

Unconditional reassurance, love, and acceptance.

To be able to sigh deeply, as Silas does, and rest in bigger arms.

Good thing there is some One who is able to hold this hurricane and calm the storm raging in me.

Snot, and Other Amazing Childhood Mysteries

Okay, I'm a nurse.  So people come to me all the time asking questions that I should know the answer to, cause I should know every random fact related to health, right?  But I don't.

Take for example these many 'health' mysteries that I have pondered since being a parent, like:

1. How does the body produce so much snot?  I mean, where does it all come from?  I am pretty sure Toby  should be bone dry by now, skin parched, joints fused, cells dehydrated, but no.  His nose keeps liquefying all over every surface of our house. Shouldn't his head be concave for lack of all the fluid it's lost?  Nope.  His noggin remains firm. Huh?  

2. How does childhood sleep math work?  I mean, is there some formula somewhere?  A child is overtired, but is less likely to sleep.  Then if they sleep more, they sleep better for longer.  What?  Shouldn't this be basic addition and subtraction?  They lose sleep, they should make up for it the next time right?  RIGHT?  

3. Where do teeth come from?  I mean, they are lying dormant under the gums and then they just erupt, from where?  What?  Am I missing something here?  Does bone just appear?

4. Vomit.  To anyone who hasn't witnessed this, you probably think that us parents are lying.  But it's true: how in the world does a child of such small stature, projectile puke so far?  I know I was never good at physics, but it seems somehow improbable that children can cover such distant lands in such numerous quantities of putrid stench, without taking a running leap at the same time.  So. Weird.

5.  There are periods of time when it seems like Silas survives off of air and fishy crackers.  Yet, by some miracle, he still produces an enormous amount of poop.  Huh?  I figured quantity in = quantity out.  But no.  He is an overachiever.  He is above his class, advanced you might say, in his ability to ingest nothing and empty his entire intestines.  It's really remarkable.  And disgusting.  (Mostly disgusting- even for a nurse).

I'm sure many of these mysteries could be solved with a query to my faithful friend Google  but where is the fun if there are no mysteries left unsolved?  Instead, I will just ponder and wonder at the miracle of growing humans and their miraculous body fluids and such.

Any mysteries of child-science that you marvel at?

On Being an Adult

Ever get those moments when you just cannot believe that you, yes you, are now an adult?  Maybe that sounds dumb, coming from an almost 30 year old.  But somehow I feel like asking, "when did this happen?"  Two little 'uns to be responsible for?  Bills to pay?  The fridge to fill, the meals to make, the shampoo to buy, the birthdays to plan for...this is my house?  These are my kids?  

I was driving along tonight, by myself (which is somewhat miraculous) and I had this moment of feeling like a teenager again.  Music loud, speed accelerating, late at night, like I didn't have a curfew (cause you know, the kids get up at 6 so I really should go to bed early)... a song from my high school years came on and I got sentimental.  Sentimental?  About high-school?  

What?

All of a sudden having all possibility before me and no real responsibilities underneath me sounds pretty, okay REALLY, good.  Not that I feel trapped or don't like my life, but it just occurred to me that I cannot believe that this is what life looks like on this side of the fence.  Wasn't I just on the other side?  Was that not just a moment ago?  A breath?  A blink?  Oh wait, it's been 10 years.  And everything, I mean EVERYTHING is different.  I'm not just heading off to college, meeting the man of my dreams, beginning a career and having international adventures (and sleeping in on weekends), I'm in fact married, with a house, with children, with a career...  But I think the same!  I act the same!  I've hardly changed, or so I think.  I even own the same sweatpants with 'field hockey' written on the butt.  If I'm really 10 years older, why don't I feel 10 years older?  Should I have accomplished more?  What do I mean by more?

I hear my internal thoughts and sometimes cannot believe I'm the one thinking them, "she's wearing that to school?  That 'kid' is old enough to do_____?  I mean, really?"  "She was born after the year 2000?"  

I got a phone call the other day too and it sounded like this:
"Hi, ummm, are you Silas' Mom?"
[pause]
"huh?"
"Are you Silas' Mom? I'm calling from the community centre.... blah blah blah"
[pause, this is so weird]

I am no longer 'Shannon' I am Mrs. Brink and Silas' Mom.
Weird. 

Anyone else have weird moments of not believing it's really you that's an adult?  Isn't it weird that you choose to go to bed early?  That you need to have coffee in the morning?  That you enjoy just sitting and talking to other adults?  That sleeping in is no longer an option?  Is anyone else experiencing this?  Why did I think I would be a young adult forever?  Shouldn't I have appreciated sleeping more?  Or staying up late?  Or going wherever I wanted to go, whenever I wanted to go there- more?

Note to younger self: enjoy more, play more, relax more, be here NOW and don't try and be somewhere else and someone older.  There is more than enough time for that.

(It's clearly 2 weeks until my birthday because I'm already needing to psych myself up to being another year older).