Wednesday, January 21, 2015

The School Debate

For months now, Jason and I have been wrestling through what to do for Silas' education.  Why does this feel like such a difficult decision? I know it's not a 'life-long' decision and you can re-evaluate.  I also know that there is no wrong or right.  No perfect education system.  And each one will have its triumphs and difficulties. So, how does one decide?!

I mean, this is obviously a first-world problem.  In Canada, we are especially blessed.  We can literally choose between at least 7 different types of schools in our area (home schooling, public school, traditional school, french immersion, christian school, environmental school, fine arts school...) Isn't that ridiculous?  In most areas of the world children are lucky to get to go to school at all.  And we have that many quality choices in education?  Makes me almost sick to think that we are that blessed.  

And yet, the choices are what is paralysing us.  

I have seen many people doing every kind of schooling well.  I see those christian families rockin the public system, I see Jason's entire family rockin' the homeschool thing, I see french immersion and private school and traditional school and fine arts school...I see everyone in their niche and they all proclaim how amazing it's been for them.

But how do I get from here, to there?  How do I be confident what is right for Silas and what is right for our family?  We can't ask other people, because everyone has their own opinion and everyone says what they chose is what works for them.  So really, it's up to us.  But who are we?  What do we value?  What is most important?  AH!

The problem is, I love the idea of each kind of schooling.  I love the flexibility and creativity that would go into homeschooling.  The fact that you can make it what you want it to be, work it around work and family life, and focus in on the things your child loves- sounds amazing.  No getting the kids in their carseats and rushing off for 8 am?  Sign me up.  No peer pressure, no bullying, no small shy child getting lost in a class of 30 kids?  Perfect.  

But I also love the idea of being involved in a local, public school.  Getting to know the families in our community better, running into them at the playground, getting involved in their lives and stories.  I love the idea of having an outside mentor for your child (their teacher) who can partner with me and be an objective helper to educating our kids.  They might see things in Silas I don't see.  They might be able to encourage or inspire or offer him instruction in areas in which I am weak in.  Music class, field trips, learning how to be a friend and be in a group setting, all sounds awesome to me.  The classroom setting was full of inspiring and bright and shiny and wonderful things for me as a child, that sounds amazing!

And Christian school- where they help teach my child about values we believe in, who instruct in culture and missions, and provide awesome music and art classes, I love it! Sounds amazing.

See the problem?  
I am crippled by the idea that Silas might miss out by not being involved in one thing or the other.

I realize that most families switch around and probably most families end up doing a bit of each type of schooling.  But where do you start?  How do you decide?

Each type of schooling has it's down sides to me too.

Theoretically homeschooling sounds amazing, but being isolated a bit more at home, as a family?  I've been home-bound (relatively) for 5 years and I don't know if I want to spend most of my time at home.  I don't know that I want the pressure of my child's entire education on my shoulders.  I don't know if I could manage it with the needs of our household and other children and still work at the same time.  (And stay sane).

Public school?  I don't really want the values of the world influencing Silas at such a young age.  Mouthy kids?  Materialism?  Bullying?  Social drama?  I don't know that I want that for Silas.  Dropping off and picking up every day, the busyness of full time kindergarten and after school activities running our family life?  No thanks.

And I don't know that I agree with completely sheltering Silas in private school.  And the cost, don't get me started on the cost!  It's like the same cost as Jason's university degree per year!  Who has that kind of money in the lower mainland!

See the problem?
We are crippled by this decision.  We don't have a feeling or an inclination towards one or the other.  I just don't know.  I see the benefits and down sides of each choice.  So what then?!  

Someone give me more advice about how to decide.  

Anyone else find this decision very difficult?  Or does everyone else see it clearly for their own family and we're the only ones wrestling with this?  Or do you just put the three ideas in a hat and pick one out?  Maybe it should come to that.  Pick one, try it, trust God and carry on...?

P.s. I don't need any more comments about why their type of school is the best because it's not actually that helpful.  HOW did you decide is what I want to know.  What type of person do you find works best with each type of school?  That's what I wanna know.  Do I have what it takes to homeschool?  Help!



1 comment:

  1. I read your blog post a while ago, but haven’t had a chance to respond. Life has been a little nutty, but I have been thinking about the question that you posed as we’ve been thinking about schooling options as well. As you might remember, I’m an ex-home-schooler (all the way through high school, too) so I don’t have experience either in private or public school. But when I think about making a decision about schooling for our child, I come at it from two different perspectives.

    The first is as a career counsellor. I think that home-schooling can be a good option, but in my case, my parents and I didn’t realize the importance of education and I filled up my high school electives with some pretty crazy stuff. This has meant that university isn’t an option for me without a lot of upgrading. However, I did go the college route and that did work out for me. However, given the difficulty that young adults have in getting and maintaining work now, I think that I was lucky and got into work at the right time. So in my opinion, I think that part of the schooling decision should take into consideration your best educated guess on what the labour market will be when your child graduates. In my case, I think about the importance of math, science and a second language so I’d be looking for educational options that would give my child the best chance in those fields of study.

    The second way of looking at schooling for me is through the lens of social justice and feminism. I believe very strongly in equality in society and I struggle with the idea of having my child go to school with people who are very similar to them in terms of ethnicity or socio-economic status. Therefore, I tend to gravitate towards more public schools more. One of the things that they rate public schools on is the number of ESL students and children with disabilities. I can understand that could mean that the teacher might be distracted with helping children with more needs than mine. (Or maybe mine will be the one who will take all the attention – I don’t know). But I value that diversity and I want my child to have exposure to different ideas, religions and abilities. I also like the idea of having my child go to school in the neighbourhood that we live in – there’s something so lovely about seeing other kids outside of school just at the park or on the trails by our house.

    So really I guess the decision comes down to what you really value (like you said) and what your best guess is for your child’s future. Good luck – I am sure you will make a great decision! I’ve read research that says that often parents’ involvement in supporting their child through their education is a key indicator of success so I can only imagine that you and Jason will be super supportive to your kids and hence any of the paths you choose could lead them to being wonderful and contributing adults in society!

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