37 weeks

Yikes. Any day now I'm going to be 'officially' a Mom. Not really sure how to process this information. How do I get ready?? I feel more uncomfortable sitting than ever- with every twist and turn the baby makes I either have to run off to the bathroom to pee, feel short of breath, or have to get up...feels like this body is definitely getting a bit too small for the two of us. So, in that way, I'm ready to be done pregnancy and meet my little boy. Yet- it's kind of,well, yup... scaring me to death. How will labour go? And after he arrives, THEN WHAT DO I DO? (okay, I need to relax a bit, but I'm super nervous about how I'll transition into motherhood). Any tips from 'been there, done that' first time parents?

my active little boy, insomnia, and other pregnancy facts

33 weeks already and insomnia has taken over. I woke up last night at 2:30, then 5:30, then was awake for good at about 6:00. Tossing, turning, peeing, ahhh! So frustrating! It doesn't even really make sense to me because I feel tired but I just can't get comfortable. And my little boy moved a little jungle gym into my belly, or at least that's how it feels. Now, don't get me wrong, I am proud of his little break dancing moves and every time he moves I feel a sense of reassurance...but at the same time.....I feel like spanking (what I think is his little bum poking into my ribs) and say, "SIT STILL!" But I guess this is what I should expect for having a little boy.

I started reading this book about raising boys called "wild things," and from what I've read and seen in little boys, I'm in for a ride! The authors of this book talk about how curious and active little boys are wired to be...oh man. I wonder why we bought a new house? I'm sure the little guy will destroy it before he's 5. Makes me think I should already change the home to fit a little boy's energy...turn the den into an empty room with rubber walls, install a fireman's pole from the top floor to the bottom. Hmm.

I can't believe in some ways that I could have this little boy any day! I feel not yet prepared- but then over prepared at the same time. I made a ridiculous amount of applesauce the other day (?) clearly unnecessary, but then I still lack a number of things from the nursery, don't have my hospital bag packed, haven't bought Christmas presents...ahhh! Will I be ready? I guess I will have to be in one way or another!

What else to report in pregnancy? I'm itchy, suddenly ravenous at random times, feel like I'm not sure if I'm going to pee my pants most of the time (especially while in superstore- I hate that place, it's far too big), and I'm wondering how it's possible that I have to wait TWO MORE MONTHS for this pregnancy to be done with. Sigh.

30 weeks

So. Got my H1N1 vaccine. hmph. I hate decisions and I hate difficult decisions even more. J and I hummed and hawed and prayed and researched and decided to go ahead. Now 2 days afterwards my legs feel achy....am I just becoming a paranoid mommy? Oh man, I guess it's the beginning of difficult decisions!

Otherwise- I've officially reached the "I can't see my feet" phase. I love the kicking and moving and dancing and re-decorating that goes on in my belly though. Baby gets inches out with his kicks and it looks soo weird and feels even more bizarre.

I'm getting on a plane next week. Ugh. I hate flying and hate it even MORE in pregnancy. Something about stale air, not being able to move, bumpy turbulence and nausea all rolled into one. Now I'm contemplating- should I wear a mask? Would people think I'M the sickie or just that I'm paranoid?

I'm nostalgic in a way to think that pregnancy only lasts a few more months but mainly just getting excited about meeting this little boy. Curly hair or straight? Dark or blond? Blue eyes or brown? Left handed or right? So many questions and anxieties until I actually count his fingers and toes.

Third trimester here I come!

Yup- here's the belly, growing bigger and bigger!

I love this part of pregnancy....and here are some of the reasons why:

-baby is wiggling, jumping, moving, hiccuping all the time (feels funny!)

-If I groan while attempting to tie my shoes, Jason will tie them for me

-I get back rubs often

-I have a good excuse to use 5 pillows at night

-Playing with my bellybutton is acceptable considering it's size

-I can still see my toes

-I get short of breath walking up a hill (which is kind of funny actually)

-3 more months and I get to hold my son!

...can't wait...

Placenta brain really does exist!

I seem to remember having a lightbulb idea of what I wanted to write about on here, but now have completey lost my brain again...it's really becoming a losing battle. Placenta - 10, Brain -1. In fact, without scaring fellow nurses too terribly out there, I made a ridiculous medication error the other day and I can't explain it except to say that I think my placenta took all my blood from my brain and I was left with a few cells to do my work. I walked clear into a different patients room, not really remembering that my patient was supposed to be a man, and gave a random woman patient my man's medication. What was I thinking? I have never made such a blatant error but I figure my life is over as I once knew it. Is this what motherhood will be like? Forgetting things mid-sentence, walking one direction then realizing I should be walking the other, having blank-out moments when I am not really sure what is going on....yikes. Someone reassure me I'll get my brain back post-child!!!

6 months

So I'm 6 months today. I have to say I'm enjoying this time more than any other so far in pregnancy. Feeling baby kicking away, getting winded walking a few feet too fast, starting to buy baby 'stuff.' I'm getting excited now that some of the major hurdles are over...or so I think! I guess I'll only get bigger and bigger from here! I like that people can actually TELL now that I'm pregnant. Although now people are asking to touch my belly, at first I was appalled! How weird of a question is that! But then I realized, 'oh yeah, it IS cool to touch a pregnant woman's belly.' Hard to get used to though! Now ahead is just trying to pick out names. I basically have to stop running names past people. I'm tired of seeing people's reactions to names I like. I figure they're pretty normal names but then...I guess we all have our opinions. I guess the name will stay a secret until the end! (especially since we haven't a clue what to call him!) I'm willing to take suggestions though...

Belly button

Had a super weird moment today...I looked down at my belly only to find that 'pop' my belly button looked super strange. I know it may look normal to some people, but truly, it has suddenly poked out more than normal. It even feels funny! Jason noticed it right away too. My body is definitely not feeling like my own anymore! Especially when lying in bed and all of a sudden it starts visibly moving from the outside. Crazy! I love that I can feel baby move more and more though.

Makes me think he's going to be a ballroom dancing, soccer playing, gymnast! Yup, that's right, HE.

P.s. it was a huge surprise! I thought for sure it was a girl- and I mean FOR SURE. I even bought this little cute pink dress and had a name picked out. When the doctor said it was a boy I was more than flabbergasted how my 'baby sense' got so mixed up. So, shhhh no telling my son that the first outfit I bought for him was a dress!

Baby boogie

For the longest time I was unsure if I was feeling the baby move or not. It felt like little flutters that I was pretty certain was not my bowels or liver or anything else...but I wasn't quite sure. Well, over the last week or so (week 20/21) I am now CERTAIN that I'm feeling the baby move. This time there are more definite 'kick-like' sensations I've been feeling. The other day I was busy all day but then sat down to rest and all of a sudden I felt the 'thud' in my belly, I was like "was that baby?" but then two seconds later, in the exact same spot, was the same thud feeling. Now I notice it a lot more. I especially notice it when I really have to pee but haven't made it to the bathroom yet, and baby either thinks a new trampoline has appeared or decides things are getting too crowded in there with my bladder in the way and starts stomping away on it. It's the weirdest sensation- baby river dance on my bladder! Sometimes too it makes me laugh out loud feeling the baby kick...it feels funny! And then, two nights ago, I was lying in bed and the thuds started coming on a certain side of my belly so I told J to put his hand there...not sure if he could feel it or not...and he could! The baby just kept kicking the same spot or head butting or whatever and jason felt it all! How special! I wonder what baby's patterns are for sleeping/moving because I feel baby move pretty erratically- mainly when I've stopped and am resting or sitting. Interesting. I love feeling the baby move though because it reminds me he/she is still there and flexing his/her little muscles!

Ultrasound

Well, we had our 20 week ultrasound today. I was really, really relieved to see that everything is going well and baby is healthy. Praise God for all your prayers. I was really becoming a basket case of worry over the last while and struggling with just giving up my concerns to God. I dunno, but I was just anxious all the time that something was wrong. OH man, is this what parenthood is going to be like?! AHHH. We did find out too that baby is growing too well in fact, bigger than average...I'm going to be huge before I know it! Baby weighs 12 ounces and just think how much bigger he/she will have to get over the next months. Yikes! We did find out what sex the baby is too, but for now it will be our little secret. We'll tell a bit later maybe once we get used to the idea ourselves! Here's a picture of our little cutie with his/her little turned up nose. CUTE! And I guess I haven't felt kicks as much because the placenta is at the front of the uterus cushioning baby from the outside world. That explains it! Either that or baby is nice and calm like his/her father (sure hope so!)

hiking with baby

Went with a crazy fun bunch of people to hike the stawamus chief in squamish today. PHEW. Up up and up. Did I mention that it's UP? I wondered, as I got to the trailhead and looked UP the big boulder we had to start the hike with, "hmmmm should I be doing this while almost 5 months pregnant?" So I huffed and puffed, stopped a lot, and did 'pulse checks' with the gang and made it up to the beautiful top. However, down was the true feat...aching knees, shaking legs....but what a gorgeous, good day.

p.s. new pregnant photos from day at approx 19 weeks.

Purple spotted bump

So 18 weeks and counting. Had a wonderful visit with family in Ontario, however, most family kept saying "you're so small!" I have to say, anxiety has been abounding. This part of pregnancy is a bit nerve wrecking. At least in first trimester the nausea was a "good sign" that things were okay. Now, having not felt the baby move yet and because I'm not showing much and have cramps now and again...I've been a bit of a worry wart. I was so relieved to hear the baby's heartbeat at my midwife appointment today that I actually started crying. Sigh. I guess motherhood is going to be emotional isn't it?

On a lighter note... the baby is the size of a...

Mango!! 6.0 in, 8.5
OR
For the y chromosome... a softball

I realize I haven't posted new pictures of my belly bump. However, it's more like a blueberry bump. (covered in bright purple bruises). I should keep track of changes in my body with pictures, but it's surprising how that takes a back burner with moving, traveling etc etc.

coming soon however...

Just blabbing

Good thing no one reads this because I'm so awful at keeping up with it! 17 weeks and counting...I feel like my pants are having issues...can't ride em low, can't raise em high. Pregnancy pants here I come! I haven't felt little one move yet, but I can't wait. Makes me nervous! I'd rather baby do hoola hoops in the belly than lie still. No other pregnancy news. I have a rather polka-dot belly right now due to the shots. I figure the next pregnancy picture I should paint on some other coloured dots and show my belly like that. Then no-one will know which are the real bruises...

Week 14

These are my debut tummy shots at 14 weeks. Just starting to look a little pregnant.

I love hearing baby's heartbeat- it's always such a relief! Went to see the midwife today. All is well- except that they forgot about taking any bloodwork. Oops. Taking lots of vitamins and pills now as well as injections. Tummy is turning purple and I'm running out of parts to stab. BUT I don't want Jason to do the injections cause I figure I'll blame his technique for the pain...

Feeling better, but still tired and still peeing ALL the time. It's my second home. I should start a craft project or something in the bathroom for pete's sake!

Getting lots of 'round ligament pain' little cramps here and there. Especially when I roll over onto my side in bed too fast.

Can't wait to feel baby move!!

J and I are trying to think of a nickname for baby. Can't come up with something. Nib was as close as we got but....don't know if it suits her. YES I said her because that's what I think the baby is...a she...but we shall see!

Week 13

Little late posting...but here it is:

Pregnancy Week 13:
Need some gas? Your wife has
some. Your baby is now the
size of the gas cap on your car

p.s. it's true. I can't stand myself sometimes and how gassy I am. Yuck!

OR:

Week 13: Peach Average size: 2.9 in, .81 oz Teeth and vocal cords are appearing...

Not much going on. Just surviving my shift work. NOT made for pregnant ladies. It's funny now that so many people are finding out!

Grumpy.

Can baby be an excuse for grumpy-ness? I was just grumpy, mean nurse for four straight days but sometimes patients just kinda set you off. First it's the arguing with you every time you tell them something, then it's being compared to John Travolta's son...? ("You know who you look JUST like?") And then it's the inappropriate comments about how my outfit or hair or whatever was more attractive yesterday than today... then it's the questions "what's in that purple bottle you have there," "what kind of coffee did you buy?" and "do you think robots will take over one day?" I mean really? And then the need for entertainment "so does the hospital have a pool, where's the cable guy?" DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOU ARE?

arg. It's either pregnancy hormones (which I'm really tempted to blame) or people are just C-R-A-Z-Y.

arg.

Baby week 12!

So I'm approaching week 12. I found this hysterical website...it was comparing baby sizes each week to fruit. I thought it was fun...but then I found the 'male version.' SO for humor and for interest, I'll include each as I go along:



For female readers: Baby is the size of a plum!
Average size: 2.1 in, .49 oz




For male readers: Baby is the size of a small measuring tape this week.

Found out that almost all of baby's vital organs are formed! Crazy!
So, we've started telling everyone about the pregnancy. Makes me nervous! Then when I feel a few cramps here and there I worry. But I had this epiphany the other day, if I start worrying now, I may NEVER stop. I guess those who are parents already can tell me if this is true or not. But the way I figure it, it's not like pregnancy is the only time to be anxious for baby. Then there's worrying about them in the crib, and when they're sick, and when they start choking on cheerios, then there's walking and wandering into dark corners....then teenaged years...it never ends? So I figure, maybe it's best not to start?

So maybe I should start taking pictures of the belly. I'm not sure if I'm showing baby at this point, or if my intestines are just so darned crammed that they're protruding from my abdomen a bit. Thing is, when I start taking belly shots you'll have to ignore the ugly purple stains of bruises from my daily shots. Maybe I should paint the belly each time to cover it up? Could be interesting. If I am showing a bit, it looks more like I've eaten a few too many chocolate chips (not that I"m denying that really). But then the question is, what do I wear? The same thing every time? Not a lot fits WELL these days.

Oh and since everyone keeps asking, we're not sure if we want to know the sex of the baby. We're at a standstill on this issue. If you know the sex, then you may have the false pretense that you know what to expect, but of course, you won't. But then...you can buy pink or blue socks ahead of time (tough choice).

Our First Baby iBrink Sighting

Precious moments to hear the heartbeat of your baby. I was so relieved to see baby up on the screen today at our first ultrasound. I still have had a hard time belieing there really is life in my womb. I believe and trust and KNOW it was God himself who allowed this life to be forming in me but I've been a bit anxious to see and hear proof. Baby was a bit of a jumping bean making it hard for us to snap pictures but this is the best one. I love his/her little foot up on the wall of his/her home (my womb). So cute.

Telling family

This was the best part...so we stopped in Ontario to visit with Jason's family and we weren't planning to tell anyone. We kept saying, "well, I'm not that far along yet...what if something happens..." But we couldn't help but tell them because we really wanted to do it in person. So we bought a couple shirts for me and some fabric paint....one shirt zipped up over the other one. At a casual family BBQ (after much razzing during the week about 'when are you guys having kids?') I got up to get more chicken from the BBQ and unzipped my shirt which had been blocking the news.

I sat down but not for long because Cheryl, Jason's sister beside me, with her keen journalistic sense, had seen part of what it said and starting freaking out! She jumped up and was like "what's it say?" WHAT DOES IT SAY?? And then everyone else was freaking out...fun moment.

Telling my family was with the same method although people didn't pick it up quite as fast. My mom was eating away at dinner not paying attention at all for like 10 minutes with my shirt sporting the news. I was about ready to stand up and shout "READ THE SHIRT."

In Spain

After we found out, we were in Spain and I saw this

fun sign board with a pregnant lady's belly so I took a picture with it. Thankfully, I'm not that big yet...

When we first knew...

So our story of finding out about baby ibrink (the reason I'm calling baby 'ibrink' is because we had a hilarious conversation...we thought it would be funny to name the baby "Isaac" or something with an 'I' because we could call baby 'ibrink'... okay so it's not that funny but for some reason we can only think of silly baby names so it WAS funny at the time).

So...we were in a rental car, driving through France. For most of our adventurous time in Europe we did plan ahead a little bit and usually had a hotel etc reserved ahead of time. Well, we had been in Avignon and thought we'd find somewhere to stay and again, booked ahead of time, but just picked randomly. I thought, hey, it'll be great- we'll stay in Aix-en-Provence...sounds like a small place, and stay in a hotel there.

Well, we had a lovely day driving around the south of France, beautiful places...and it was getting late and dark so we headed into Aix-en-Provence. Did we have a map of the area? Nope. No worries, simple right? WRONG. We had no directions for the place, and no map and it was getting later and darker. The highways were huge. We drove around basically in circles getting nowhere...finally thought to go to the train station and see if there was a pay phone to call the hotel. No pay phone. We ended up banging on the doors of a car rental place who kindly gave us a map and directions.

We eventually found it but I was super frustrated and arghh the hotel wasn't that great.

But nonetheless, it was the next morning when we were set to do the pregnancy test. I kinda knew it would be a plus because I was majorly late and had been tracking it...but sleepy and groggy-eyed, I stumbed to the bathroom early in the morning and...voila...baby ibrink.

I kept asking Jason if it was really a plus sign or if I was seeing things...he verified it.

But in Ontario, before telling family, since I was still in denial, we got another pregnancy test and took one there...and another plus (still I kept saying...am I really pregnant?)

Now, having seen baby ibrink for real on ultrasound and after 3 months of nausea, it's starting to sink in.